More Awesome Than You!

Is it possible to remove a first woohoo?  Not just the memory but the very existence of it so that the next time my Sim woohoos, that will be her first?

My Sim at some point in time unknowingly woohooed with some friggin dormie (my guess was that it was Shaklin's lovebed) and now all my plans for her to lose her virginity on her wedding night to her triple-lightning bolt dream man are dashed.   >:(

The memory is the first woohoo, if you remove it, it will go away. And that's what you get for using those evil things.

Oh good, I was hoping it would be that easy.  Thanks!  :D

Shaklin's bed isn't evil.  It was my fault for leaving it on autonomous during a party, that's never a good idea.  Unless it's one of those kinds of parties...

Maybe that was your sim's way of telling you, she couldn't wait that long...  :D

Ste

Virginity is highly overrated.

So you want your Sim to have a bad wedding night?

Actually, that'd be pretty funny.

Your sim goes into aspiration failure due to a dud screw!!  :D

Awww, noooo.  It'll be magical.   ;D

The whole virgin bride thing was unintentional at first.  I realized about halfway through college that my Sim was still a virgin when a "Have Very First Woohoo" want popped up.  I was pretty surprised because she was a Pleasure Sim with the 50 first date wants and I thought she had already woohooed with one of the neighbor boys but I guess she's a good girl.  I decided that I would have her work on her LTW and that her 50th first date would be with the man she would marry.  It was just this night and I found out that he's a Romance Sim and the first fear that rolled up was "Get Married to Jadyn (my Sim)".  It was their first date, he barely even knew her!

But since he's a Romance Sim that means he's experienced so I imagine their wedding should be satisfying.  And she's rich so at least he'll get a good memory from marrying her.

Virginity should be lost early so that the wedding night can be spent properly: eating leftover cake and steak, drinking champagne, and opening envelope after envelope of money.  Ah, sweet memories.

Does anyone honestly remember their first time being "magical"? (It's the kind of term I absolutely hate when applied to sex ever, but anyway.) Unless one's sex life is a total mess, the first time is comparatively quite bad.

By the way, as an unmarried non-virgin, I'm highly offended by the implication that only unsexed uptight prudes can be "good" ;).

Magical? Nah. Messy and uncomfortable.

As an unmarried virgin, I'm highly offended by the implication that the first time is bad.

If both parties are inexperienced/first-timers, then the chances are your first time having sex will not be a mind-blowing experience. That's just reality. Everything takes practice, including being a fantastic lover, and getting to know the other person's preferences. Expecting something bigger than life from your first ever time in the sack will likely just get you disappointed. I'm not a pessimist, just a realist.

Sex is overrated anyway.

Sometimes I feel incredibly sorry for you, when I am not bemused and bewildered by you.

A nice red "First Woohoo" memory would be great, actually. I mean, for the game.  :D

If the sim that was WooHooed with was male, the text could read.

Hey, at least *I* *LIKE* the way I am. YOU, on the other hand, seem to wrestle with self-loathing issues. Like how you object vehemently to the fact that you have a fat head, even though it's true. Why you seem to object to this is beyond me. Do you see me objecting to being considered an asshole, or for my horrible skin? No, I *LIKE* the way I am. If you started calling me snake-man, I wouldn't be bothered by this at all. I don't see why you should feel sorry for me. I *LIKE* what I am. I am *AWESOME*! Now being YOU, on the other hand, THAT would suck. And not even because of your fat head, either.

First time..? I felt nothing but vague disappointment that sex was built up to something important when it was uncomfortable and quick. And it rapidly becomes dull unless you're 'in love' or keen on playing lots of games.

Anyone else feel the need to refer to El Pres. as "Snake Man"?

Ahem, does not. :) It rapidly becomes better. The first time is just weird though. It's something you have to get over so you can start actually doing it right. Like when you ride a bike for the first time and fall over immediately -- but you eventually get the hang of it.

Why the "in love" in quotation marks, btw? You don't have to be in love to have great sex, but that doesn't mean love is meaningless.

blah blah blah.  Like I care what you think of me.  Those days are over.

I like that idea very much  :D

Actually, I agree with Pescado. Whether he's being serious or not.

Something can be very, very good, and yet still overrated. People can be unhealthily obsessed with something that would, in fact, be very good for them if approached in a healthy manner.

In our day, sex appears to be one such something.

[/Retardo Land pontificating]

P.S. There ought to be random texts to go along with the First Woohoo memory, not just the usual gloop we get for memories. Such as:

"Not bad...now to try a little compare-and-contrast..." (for Romance sims)
"Well. That wasn't quite what I expected."
"Why was I so desperate to do that again?"
"Please don't re-virginize me. That was awkard enough the first time around."
"Now I know why there are professionals."

My first time was pretty awesome, yes. No rose petals, but you could call it that.

First time was definitely not awesome.  With a guy I had been lusting after for a couple of years though, so that was pretty cool.

Unfortunately, he did not live up to my own hype. :P

P.S.  I also always name a Sim after him.  Dunno why I do that.

Same here, only he lived up to the hype. Was definitely Not So Bad.

It helps a whole lot. The things that make sex really good (taking pleasure in the other person's pleasure, looking for the best ways to please, serious willingness to put oneself out there) come more naturally with love. And comfort with each other - which makes it difficult for first timers. Even if one is experienced, the other one is likely too nervous.

My first time was kinda meh. Depends on what you consider a first time or how you define woohoo. ;)

The very first time I woohoo'd all the way, so to speak, was... not bad... in the sense that, uh... I really enjoyed it physically at least... to put it mildly, to completion. Heh. But... emotionally, mentally, it was not awesome. That can happen with strangers I guess.

The very first time I woohoo'd with someone I actually liked was pretty nice. And the very first time we went all the way was very, very nice. Of course, those first, explorative times are kind of fumbley and a tad awkward and messy, but it was definitely fun. It definitely takes practice, and over time, we got a lot of practice. :D

Since then, I've been the very first woohoos for a couple other guys, and well, not to toot my own horn but... ahem... *toot* I must have done something right because they kept comin back. ;D

Anyways, back to the topic of sims, it would be kind of funny if the very first woohoo wants were randomly bad memories as well, depending on their mood and/or personality or something. On the other hand, despite the first times for many people being kind of awkward and cumbersome, that's sort of part of the growing pains of life and what not. So while they might not exactly be the most awesomest of memories, I tend to look back on those moments with sort of a positive, whimsical, nostalgic sense of innocence and inexperience.

Ste

i just felt like it made up for the crappiness of my first kiss, which was I didn't really want. It was sloppy and unpleasant too.

I didn't enjoy my first time at all.
It was kinda like "well this isnt as good as everyone else makes out"

What I want to know is how, no matter how sloppy and uncoordinated it us, your first time can possibly not be "magical" if you choose the right time, place, and person to be with?  Not that I'm passing out character judgments on anyone who says it wasn't that great, but if it's supposed to be an expression of deep, passionate love how can it not be wonderful?  I mean, my first kiss terrible.  (The guy just would not believe I didn't feel that way about him until I beat him into a bloody pulp.)  The second one, on the other hand, was actually wanted and appriciated, and it came from a guy that I'd had a major crush on for months.  I can't imagine that "woohoo" would be any different.

*giggles* You said kisses weren't as good as making out! *giggles more* You're right! ;)

Well, I waited until I was 18, and in love, and with the man who, much later, became my husband.  He'd done it one other time, with the girfriend before me.  He actually took the time to read up on deflowering virgins in some sex magazine, because he wanted it to be good.  He was sweet, we were both nervous anyway, the actual act lasted less than a minute.  I wanted to say, "You mean that's it?"  If you're old like me, and you have theBon Jovi Album, "Slippery When Wet", listen to the very beginning of "Social Disease", because that's how it went down.  LOL  But, it's not a bad memory.  It's something very speical that we shared.  It's more of an emotional, mental attatchment.  But, that's what makes us more than just animals in heat, I guess.   :P

Oh, and as to better, well, ya have to work at it.  But, there are nights when Hubby and I look at each other and say, 'One of these days, we're gonna kill each other doing this!"  and then, there are nights we look at each other and say, "Eh.  You didn't help with the housework and your breath smells like rotten cheese.  Think I'll roll over and go to sleep."  LOL

I've experienced great sex in love and not in love. I've experienced crappy sex in love and not in love. Liking and being comfortable with and, most of all, respecting each other are necessary. Love... meh.

Avalikia: Kissing and sex are rather different anatomical acts :P. My first time, I was deeply and passionately in love, I was 18, with my boyfriend who really was awesome (though the breakup a couple years later was a mess), yada yada. It wasn't "magical", it was uncomfortable and weird.  The second and third times the next day were definitely much better ;D. I don't understand why anyone puts this huge pressure on it anyway -- it's just sex! It's never "magical" because magic doesn't exist. It can be totally awesome. It is something one definitely misses when one does not have it. But in the grand scheme of life, it just is NOT a big deal. I think women (and men) often have to weight it with all this weird baggage to be happy about doing it because they're uncomfortable with their bodies, guilty about the sex, guilty about enjoying it without slapping a ton of hearts and flowers on it...

Sometimes being romantic is nice, and sometimes not being romantic is nice, whatever. But real love doesn't take place in the bedroom; too many women get gulled by hearts, flowers and great sex into staying with total assholes. Real love is being there for each other, every day, making compromises, dealing with the daily grind of living together.

My first time, the radio was on and "It's the End of the World As We Know It" by REM was playing.  :P

I bled a lot and fainted in the bathroom the next morning. I must have hit my head on the tub faucet because there was a clump of hair stuck to the little puller-upper thingy (you know, to make the shower come on???)

So it was all good I take it?  :P

Magical.

That sounds both incomprehensible and disgusting. I'll stick with my method, thanks.

Not with a 10-foot pole...

 :o :o :o :o :o
Wow!!!!  Brynne, I'm sorry all that happened to you.  

Whatever.  This is the Sims, not reality.  Her first time will be magical.  8)  Don't hate on my Sim just because all of your first times sucked.  :P   

And being a virgin doesn't make you a prude.  It makes you someone who has never had sexual intercourse, plain and simple.

*dies laughing* I don't even remember my first time...or who it was with  ::)

But I do remember my first attempt!  a friend walked in on us (she certainly got an eyeful before she quickly left the room) and that kind of ruined that *laughs*  probably a good thing since we were both in 8th grade  ;D 

Up until my divorce I didn't understand what the hype was about.  After I left the ex... OH MY GOD!  8) 

Yes, that's why I winked. See, like this: ;). I wish we had cuter winky-doods here.

I need to sleep some time this week.

In my case, I'm mostly a virgin because I haven't met a decent, unmarried guy that I'm not closely related to.  All the guys in high school were immature jerks, and since high school all the guys that grew out of that got married pretty much immeadiately.  It's like trying to buy apples in the supermarket when there's only a few left: they weren't taken by the people who were there before for good reason (I thought I'd have more time before things got to that state, I'm only 23 for pete's sake).  All that's left are the brused ones that are starting to go moldy.

I wouldn't call myself overly picky when it comes to guys either.  I could care less about what they look like so long as they have a good personality, is that so hard to ask?  I can barely find dateable material.  (The last one I mentioned at the beginning of this post (http://www.moreawesomethanyou.com/smf/index.php/topic,5167.msg148423.html#msg148423).  Sad, isn't it?)  But sooner or later, a decent guy will move here and I'll see him first, or I'll give up on this area and move somewhere else.  (Hopefully the former, because then I wouldn't have to give up this sweet internet connection).

Very well said :).

It doesn't have to be flowers and "romance" be magical. If you are deeply, passionately in love- real love... and if it is something you really want to do, and you are comfortable with that person...

It's still not "magical". If you want to apply that terminology to your own life, go ahead, but it's the kind of thing that drives me absolutely up the wall. Until a guy literally flies through my window, it is not "magical", and if he did that I'd be running the other way anyway. Or finding a really big flyswatter.

I've been there, I've done that, I'm moving in with it in two weeks. Not magic, not miraculous, just normal life, which is sometimes awesome and sometimes not.

See, it's the idea that he has to fly through the window to make it special that drives me up a wall. "Magical" is what you make of it.

It implies that nothing will ever be enough, and even if you DID get something that fit your definition, you'd only be disappointed, because you can't be satisfied with loving someone and feeling that bond with them. I don't think it's something you need to sugarcoat for it to naturally feel that way, especially the first time. It's about seeing what's special in normal life and not discounting it as nothing, just for being ordinary.

/me flies through neriana's window and zaps her right between the legs eyes with his magical digits.  :D

Hehe. Yeh, I don't know you all that well to be doing that sort of thing, but I just couldn't resist, it was so funny!

I've had a few 'magical' moments myself... but those were probably because I was... ahem... under the influence to put it mildly, and so... it really did feel 'magical' to me. Like really mindblowingly so... well, my mind wasn't the only thing being blown at the time. Heh. The magical digits can be really awesome too.  ;D

Ste

*swats Syberspunk*

Freighting the "first time" with all this significance is what sets anyone up for disappointment. It will never be that significant again because there is only one first time. Just like saying your wedding day is the best day of your life -- oh well, all downhill from there. And then you get people who are upset because their first time or their wedding day wasn't this incredible glorious "magical" (gag) experience. You get bridezillas and people with even more hang-ups about sex because this ONE time is supposedly Oh So Important. But it just isn't.

I have been passionately, deeply, and truly in love twice in my life, once with someone who makes me very happy right now and with whom I plan to spend the rest of my life -- though I know sometimes things don't work out the way we hope. However, I don't believe in the objective significance of "first times", love at first sight, one perfect person for you in the world, knights in shining armor, "magic" in connection with, well, anything, or the Easter Bunny. I do, however, believe in the Invisible Pink Unicorn, may her horniness bless us all.

I wasn't hung up about it at all... maybe that's why it turned out to feel that way for me. It was actually more of a relief, because I was raised with too much church- so instead of being obsessed with it, it was something I avoided until I just realized I didn't feel that way anymore. At that point I'd already been with that person for a long time and I trusted him completely, and I wanted it because I was in love, not because of some obsession with my "first time." If you are madly in love like that, even if it is messy or awkward, what on Earth would you have to be disappointed about? How could the start of something wonderful NOT be significant? I mean, after that point, it certainly wasn't downhill, and everything that happens afterwards is part of what *made* it special in the first place.

So, for me, it *was* magical and wonderful and all that. That's just how it felt. And it's stupid to pretend there is no magic in ordinary life, or that the only "magic" comes from a knight in shining armor or the easter bunny or whatever because life can really be that good without it. I understand what you mean, but I think it is a mistake to think that you have to have things a certain way for something to be this incredible experience. And I think that is where people really go wrong. If you are marrying the person you love, even if it rains and half the guests don't show or there are rats in the pantry or whatever, I think that makes it any less incredible.

Aren't rats usually in a pantry? Isn't that where you keep them? The only other thing I could imagine that you might keep in a pantry might be, well, pants, I guess. I've never understood why it's called a pantry when you don't keep pants in it...

I have to chime in and say I really enjoyed my first sexual experience, with a guy who was also new to sex. We'd been together for a few months and all I can say is, IT WAS FUN.

And mostly it kept on being fun, so I guess I've been lucky. Not to mention I grew up during the lax post-hippie pre-AIDs era.  8)

Ideally, one's partner would have a solid sense of fun, awareness of their own body, and a knack for communication/feedback.  These trump raw experience any day of the week.  "love" is nice because it encourages communication and attention to one's partner.  But the above list is what really makes or breaks a lover.

As far as the experience thing, though, I do have to chime in.  When I get in bed with someone, it doesn't feel right if I don't feel special.  "You're special, the only one I've opened myself like this up for" is pretty much that in a nutshell.  "You're special, but I've felt this way a few times before" doesn't pack quite the same punch, clearly.  "You're special guy #47" tends to carry that super-sexy feeling of being told to take a number.  The people who deny that history does/should matter always sound self-serving and hollow to me.

That's well-said and I agree. I just think 'love' (which I probably use in a different fashion than some - I don't mean 'infatuation') enables that.

For me, 26 years, 3 children, 2 grandchildren, all the trials and tribulations, and still beauty of the body (in a not superficial way) IS magical :)

All this talk of "magical" and flying through windows made me laugh out loud as it brought back memories.

It was the first time for my (now) husband and I, although we were both of us very very far from virginal and  had known each other for quite a while. We were in a hotel room (at a SF convention we were attending--we hadn't gone there for sex) and were locked in a passionate clench, thrusting away. We tried to roll over...and found ourselves falling out of bed. One of those slo-mo moments. Himself actually had the presence of mind to get his hand under the back of my head before we hit with a jarring thud. We looked at each other for a long, stunned moment, and all I could think of to say was the line from Toy Story--"That wasn't flying! That was falling...with style!" We both started laughing until we were crying, while coming up with totally random quotes, until he said, "Remember, you can't fall off the floor..."

Next morning my back was abraded raw from the rug (likewise his elbows and knees), his hand was purple where he'd smashed it keeping my head from bumping...and we couldn't stop smiling at each other like twitterpated idiots. I could accurately use almost every descriptor in this thread to describe that night...it was messy, awkward, painful, hysterically funny...and magical.

Same here Witch. That's why I've been staying out of this one, because words can't even describe the fun of that era.  Coming of age in the latter half of the 70's in Europe was utterly and completely diffent than coming of age now-a-days. Pity them.

Great story croiduire, that'd be my idea of magical too :) The ability to laugh is an important element.

Is it really so different? (that being my time period as well, more or less).

First time with my hubby was in the back of my car in front of my friend's house. We got into a tickle fight and ended up molesting each other.

Oh yeah, and I was his supervisor at work.

When we finished, he was all, "Awww, now we have to be sweet hearty to each other."

To which I replied, "Yeah, if you want to keep your schedule the way it is, you do."

My first time was physically pretty good but emotionally meh.

My best friends, though... True love. Waited until marriage. And had an absolutely horrible wedding night. Neither one knew what the hell they were doing and she ended up in a lot of pain with a lot of blood. They had both wanted it to be perfect and magical and everything that the storybooks said it was supposed to. As a result, they didn't really have any practical knowledge and ended up needing some pointers and a few more tries before they got it right. Once they did, though... It's still True Love. The magic just took a little longer. ;)

r=sagana link=topic=5428.msg156135#msg156135 date=1157023334]
For me, 26 years, 3 children, 2 grandchildren, all the trials and tribulations, and still beauty of the body (in a not superficial way) IS magical :)
[/quote]

That is magical. It's beautiful too. Congratulations sagana!

I wasn't one iota hung up about it about it and I was in love. It was still weird. You're being more intimate with anyone than you ever have, you're actually physically changing your body, and you're doing a really strange thing you've never done before. It hurt and it was strange. It was not a bad experience but it was not one of my greatest experiences either by any means. I don't particularly like the implication that I must not REALLY have been in love or that I must REALLY have been hung up about something, or I would have felt the same way you did.

I think you're not comprehending me at all. "Incredible" is not the same as "magical". There is no such thing as "magic", and labeling normal, everyday things like sex "magical" makes me want to barf. Childbirth isn't "miraculous" either, it's biological. I hate this obfuscation of normal life. As if there's something so wrong with everyday experience -- and sex is an everyday experience -- that we must use ridiculous, hyperbolic terms to make it worthwhile.

Since I started, I've always had a great sex life (well, when I've had someone to have it with, which has been pretty constant except for a dry spell of 2 years after I broke up with my first boyfriend). Since before I had intercourse, since that's not the only sexual experience out there. I don't have hang-ups and I don't date jerks -- and I don't pretend sex is something it's not. The first time is utterly meaningless unless you decide to shove meaning onto it.

Soylent Sim: You say denying history is self-serving. I say insisting that you be told you're the ONLY one someone has ever felt this way about sounds narcissistic. People had lives before they met you. Did I love my first boyfriend? Completely, passionately and utterly. Do I love my current boyfriend? Absolutely. He's the one I want. That's all that matters, and he's smart enough to know that. Or I wouldn't have bothered with him in the first place.

I happen to live in a world full of magic, at least by the definition: "characteristic of something that works although no one really understands why." I've studied enough biology, genetics, and physics to marvel at how often everything goes right. I can explain in excruciating detail about cellular replication and systemic divergence, and none of that explains the sheer transcendence I felt when I gave birth to my first child. Although I understand the technical process, to me it remains magical when a tree changes overnight from green to scarlet in the autumn, or in spring goes from bare, cold branches to an explosion of flowers. Stars are magic. And so is love--limbic receptors, neurotransmitters and amygdala activity define and document, they don't explain.

This may only be a matter of semantics, easily resolvable once we can all decide on a common definition, or it might be a matter of point-of-view, of the glass half full or half empty type. But one thing is sure: there's no right or wrong answer here, just different experiences and unique individuals.

I'm a glass half-full type who lives in a world of nature, not magic. I don't need something that doesn't exist to be happy and filled with wonder. Just because we don't understand it, that doesn't make it magic; it just means we don't understand it yet. Maybe we never will. But mystery is totally unecessary for beauty -- truth is the most beautiful thing in the world.

Actually doesn't that make you a "the glass is neither half full nor half empty. The container is improperly engineered for the volume of fluid it must contain" type?  :D

No, it makes me the "this glass can contain this much liquid, so I'll just get up and get a refill when I feel like it" type ;).

Lol. Pwned! Sometimes sexual harrassment rules. ;D

First time - painful and rather disappointing despite being "in love"

I used to think that sex would be better if it were "special" but after being married for six years I think it is much better when it is relatively new and there is still an excitement factor.  Not to say sex with my husband is bad, but it doesn't have the thrill it used to when you're with someone new.

Now I think that were I ever to mysteriously become single (not something I am planning, by the way) I would enjoy having sex with friends who I was physically attracted to although I would still be unlikely to have "one night stands" because I'm rarely that attracted to people right off the bat.  Personality is important to attraction for me. 

I do think though that sex not being good if you're not "in love" comes from hangups and guilt feelings (that I've managed to shed over the years) rather than an inability to have really good sex without love.

Love without sex becomes unsatisfying.  Sex without love at least is sex.

PS.  Woohoo! Got reply 69 in a thread about sex...

Just wanted to say that I agree with everything you've said here.  I love my husband very much, and we have great sex.  But, I do sometimes miss that excitement of a new person, the discovery of sex with someone new.  I'm not looking to trade him in.  There's also something to be said for the security that comes from being with your best friend, someone you've known and been with your entire adult life. 

Maybe that's why my favorite sims to play are Romance Sims.  LOL

What's exciting about someone new is the conquest (ok, probably people won't like that term - the... um... 'thrill' of being wanted, feeling attractive? something like that) not the sex. Infatuation (being "in love" and all excited) is fun, but it's not the sex part. Maybe you can find a way to add some of that back into your existing relationship (dates, roleplay etc.), if your partner is game (highly recommends some means that doesn't include another person because it's so dang complicated, but to each his or her own).

Oh and thank you Elfpuddle :)

SEX bah humbug.  I remember all the good sex I had was when I was on some good drugs.  ;D

but now that I am clean and sober for a long time,  I am a Eunich now.   rofl.

where is this? lala land?  where was my steak?  ;D