Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!

[baratron]

Well, I'm not submitting this, since I just clicked the author page for one of the entries, but seriously, take a look at some of these stories.
http://thesims2.ea.com/mysimpage/uploads.php?user_id=1804721&asset_type=story
My favourites are FaT cAmP!, The Bunny, and The Crumplebottom Story (blue carpet=water?).
This person succeeds in making cruel fun of fat people, retarded people, and homosexuals in some of the most horribly written, pointless stories I've ever encountered.  What beats me is how all these stories are rated four stars. 

I think the "best" of them all is ThE sToRy Of MiSs>mOuSe!1!1!1, which features entries such as:
Then dAdAdsfbmkdl Dididididided and vgfaljflkcv klcfkfd then ghjdzh bit his kfejgods leggggg kofdjgifld mke;sjgkfldsknfdgklgd and drrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaged him INSNSNfngnjf in

Apparently, Ok do not ask about the story please me and michelle were BORED out of our minds!. But I agree with eevilcat - definitely on something more hallucinogenic than coke.

http://thesims2.ea.com/exchange/story_detail.php?asset_id=171315

Just a bunch of pictures of a womans boobs. Why even make it?

Is it me, or does the "Nicole" sim look like a 60 year old woman who's had tons of plastic surgery in an attempt to stay "looking young". Like the Bride of Wildenstein.

I hope this hasn't been posted before, because I'm a huge fan of this person's work.  Short stories, simple plots, but definitely Pulitzer territory if you ask me. 

And while not as good, I like this one too.  Not as emotionally provocative as the first selection, but I think it delves into the human phyche on a philosophical level not reached by common literature.

The first "story" has a plot, sort of. But the second one doesn't even begin to make sense! "They" did this and then "they" did something else? I couldn't even figure out the relationships of the people to each other!

Wow . You found some impressively bad junk, LK.

http://thesims2.ea.com/exchange/story_detail.php?asset_id=168844&searchPage=exch&search=1&asset_type=story&key=sex&order=UPDATE_DATE+desc&nrows=50&storyCat=&locality=&country=&view=new&hideFramework=&languageCode=
"This is my story on how I climbed to the top of the social ladder."
Ridiculously idealistic actress is ecstatic when she lands a commercial.  The carpool driver warns her that Marisa Bendett is evil.  Idealistic actress's husband kisses Marisa.  Idealistic actress sleeps with her agent.  Idealistic actress confronts husband about cheating; they had such a trusting marriage that she had security cameras installed to watch him).  Husband rapes actress.  Ooh!  It's a cliffhanger.
As an aspiring actress, I found this gritty depiction of the thespian life to be incredibly enlightening.

I love the way this starts out as a happy story - the woman is married to a handsome husband and they have two children (twins, of course). And then it suddenly goes wrong in a bizarre, over-dramatic manner, completely out of sorts with the characters as they've been portrayed thus far.

Also, I believe you have it wrong - she didn't have cameras installed in the house, but instead camras. What the Campaign for Real Ale has to do with the story, I don't know. 

http://thesims2.ea.com/exchange/story_detail.php?asset_id=170275&searchPage=exch&search=1&asset_type=story&key=sex&order=UPDATE_DATE+desc&nrows=50&storyCat=&locality=&country=&view=new&hideFramework=&languageCode=
We start in medias res.  Woman has an affair with husband's best friend.  Woman drinks lots of beer and eats pizza until she gets woozy and vomits.  Woman is pregnant.  "Honey, I'm pregnant," she explains to her husband, who is obviously thick enough not to notice the maternity clothes and the second trimester belly.  Of course, that could have been from the beer.  Woman apparently stays in kitchen for three to six more months, drinking beer.  Paramour telepathically knows it's his baby.  They sleep together.  Husband and wife sleep together.  Wife breaks up with paramour.  Paramour tries to rape woman.  Husband shoots paramour, wife thanks husband and admits affair, and everyone is happy.
I feel sorry for the baby.  Not only are its parents total idiots, but it's a born alcoholic.

Sadly, this "asset" has been deleted. I weep.

Here's a story I found a few months back.

The Shea Family
Very tl;dr, but humorous. Here's the gist: woman has a ton of sex with this one guy and gets four kids, but the guy won't take care of them. She asks mom to help her, but mom FORCES her to be with him and be his "slave." Kids and mom get beaten up and abused. Mom moves away. Then suddenly, they all die of the plague. THE END LOL

Also deleted, *sob*.

I nominate this one. A short yet heartwaming tale of the most famous manwhore in the sims2, don lothario.

BaddabingBaddaboom!

What a cheap beginning - starting with the premade shots that come with the game! Notice how the quality of photography goes down as knattu4life starts taking the photos - they become fuzzy, with walls randomly down. Also, the text accompanying them is classic:

nina then puts her hand on a certain place of mine and we soon do the duty...

inking below my pants...is achievement

Oookay .

[Gwill]

And while not as good, I like this one too.  Not as emotionally provocative as the first selection, but I think it delves into the human phyche on a philosophical level not reached by common literature.

The first "story" has a plot, sort of. But the second one doesn't even begin to make sense! "They" did this and then "they" did something else? I couldn't even figure out the relationships of the people to each other!

That's because it's also backwards.
I've never experimented with the story thing much, but I have noticed that when you add another picture to a story it goes to the top of the list when it seems like it should go on the bottom of the list.  I've never checked to see what order they go in if it's actually uploaded, but I'm assuming that bit of confusion is the cause of these weird stories.

[Ellatrue]

This one wins the prize for horrible exposition. Love the violation of the "show, don't tell" rule.

"I know we have had this discussion before, but I need to get this off my chest. You're way to young to be dating!" replied Gina, the mother. Lilly said nothing, but you could see what she WOULD say from the expression on her face."

See, that's classic exposition, there. But then, in the next frame, she does answer!!!!

The best part is how the story ends:

Rate high, everyone!!!
If your thinking about writing stories, then keep on going! Never give up on it! (If you don't know how to create a story, go to my guide of stories coming out in March of 2007!
Luv ya<3
- xDirtyBlondeRx -

I was really looking forward to that story guide, but it looks like she gave up on it. What a shame!

[notveryawesome]

Perhaps she used up killed off all of her brain-cells writing bad stories.

[frivolous]

LOL A++ thread
when july is over keep doing this please
this is freakin amazing haha, my favorites are the viva forever music video and the whorehouse story, as well as the story with the random unexplained satanist-baby in the background

here's someone attempting a "fantasy" story with a craptastic MS paint coverpage:
http://thesims2.ea.com/exchange/story_detail.php?asset_id=173936&asset_type=story&user_id=1634679
and there's 4 parts. o:

The woman walked walked closer." we don't have time for this our lives are on the lina"
Kayla looked at her akwardly :well I hope you make it through" she stampered in a Sassy False-hoping Tone.

WHAT IS THAT EVEN SUPPOSED TO SAY.

[Khaki]

Wow frivolous, excellent find! I have no idea what the story is about, but still it's excellent. That green woman sure did come out of nowhere. 
My fave line from that one is:

She Opened her eyes that had recently been shut.

and and what's what's with with the the double double words words?

[sloppyhousewife]

She Opened her eyes that had recently been shut.

Pointing out the obvious has always been one of my favorite stylistic devices.

hahha sound spreds REALLY FAST
http://thesims2.ea.com/exchange/story_detail.php?asset_id=169523&asset_type=story&user_id=3859242

As fast as sound waves d'you reckon? 

LOL, witch

[kuronue]

Don't you see the deeper meanings here?

Mama : she went ghost

Everyone : HA HA HA HA

Clearly this isn't just a whorehouse, it's a whorehouse for the mentally retarded! Giving poor retarded women (and a man) jobs so they can earn a living, as well as free room and board! Papa must have felt so caring towards his poor retarded wife that he opened this place for other retards!

ETA:

<> Will Lilly give birth to a baby?

no, I think she'll give birth to an adult cow.

the Green woman looked into the mans Face. " here should besafe now,"she wispered. "if you need to tell me tellme now." Themans face didn't look abit determind actually quiet inocent."they want to kill us!" screamed the man."Everyone of us!"

...does that have ANYTHING to do with the slides prior to and after it?

Oh, I see, it's forshadowing. Badly. WTH? With an entire forest to be in, she decides she has to sit in the one spot that's occupied? sheesh.

[notveryawesome]

It also contains one of my pet peeves, using the word 'quiet' instead of 'quite.' *goes postal*

[Ellatrue]

I actually almost liked this story (compared to the others, anyway). The spelling and punctuation was terrible, but no one is raped and it was almost interesting. It kept making you think something would happen, although nothing ever did. Or maybe I was too hopeful? Still, more creative than the stuff we've seen so far.

BUT her fiance's name is GEPTO. What kind of name is that?!

[witch]

BUT her fiance's name is GEPTO. What kind of name is that?!

Last letters left in the scrabble tray?
A personal bet?
Sympathy for previously underused letters in the story?
 

[Invisigoth]

This last one made me think of Waiting For Godot.  I think that a lot of people think that if they write something disjointed where nothing actually happens then it will seem really deep and intense.  Possibly because they missed the point of Godot.  Or maybe they've never heard of Godot and I'm giving this writer way too much credit.  It felt like it was trying to be riddled with significance, though.

[ieliminate]

Yet another father rapes daughter, and omg she's pregnant. Not as good as some of the others, but it has rape so it must be good.
http://thesims2.ea.com/exchange/story_detail.php?asset_id=176361

The Youri Stevenson sequel, not as good as the original, but if you couldn't sleep not knowing what happened- here it is.

http://thesims2.ea.com/exchange/story_detail.php?asset_id=176306

The Whorehouse story was hilarious. My favorite parts included, but are not limited to:

Well, my cousin is in this line of work and the money is great for her, but shes a corner hoe and i dont want to be in that kind of danger
She's a murderer, couldn't she handle the street corner just fine?

Mama : she went ghost
I think Mama likes cartoons.

[notveryawesome]

I think the use of the word 'hoe' (a garden tool) in lieu of the word 'ho' (slang for whore) really gives it that special something.

[Ellatrue]

That night I had the all-time worst dream..... I drempt I was pregnant , thinking of names with my father and father of my child jayda or jaycee I wonder

Y'know, if I were pregnant from rape and incest the absolute LAST thing on Earth I would be thinking is "gee, now what do I name the baby? Oh, I'll name it after the rapist"


Actually, I'm a little concerned about this story-

He just kissed me and I felt like garbage

Do you think any of these could be based on real abuse?

[rohina]

I think the use of the word 'hoe' (a garden tool) in lieu of the word 'ho' (slang for whore) really gives it that special something.

It reminds me of that excellent episode of Corner Gas where the town committee wanted them to build a giant hoe as a landmark. Lots of jokes about a great big dirty hoe.

[SaraMK]

And sorry about the spelling mystakes in joy.

 

[witch]

Do you think any of these could be based on real abuse?

I suspect many are - or from garbled accounts they've heard from other kids at school.

[kuronue]

Do you think any of these could be based on real abuse?

I suspect many are - or from garbled accounts they've heard from other kids at school.

I think once upon a time, someone wrote a rape story in sims. It was daring, it was edgy, it was cutting-edge, it toyed with the perceptions as a kiddy game while being tasteful. In short, it rocked.

That story was deleted, but not before 3 12-year-olds saw it. In an effort to top it, they pushed the limit: now it was incest-rape!

Those were deleted, but not before a dozen 12-year-olds saw them. They had to top it! They had to get more extreme! Incest-toddler-rape! Twins! Extreme childbirth!

soon every 12 year old on the BBS thought these were normal stories, the kind you're supposed to be telling. They lost the ability to come up with original stories and just copy each other.

[notveryawesome]

Considering that so many of the 12-year-olds writing these stories seem to have a very romanticised view of rape (the victim falling in love with the rapist), I think they just have no idea what the term 'rape' actually means. It doesn't help that many films and cheesy romance-novels perpetuate the myth that 'no' really means 'yes' and that the woman being raped secretly likes it, especially if the rapist is a hunk. Bleurgh.

[kuronue]

Considering that so many of the 12-year-olds writing these stories seem to have a very romanticised view of rape (the victim falling in love with the rapist), I think they just have no idea what the term 'rape' actually means. It doesn't help that many films and cheesy romance-novels perpetuate the myth that 'no' really means 'yes' and that the woman being raped secretly likes it, especially if the rapist is a hunk. Bleurgh.

Literotica.com is full of similar stories, just not in sims. Every rapist there apparently goes in through the window, ties the girl up and threatens her to keep her quiet, then pleasures her with his fingers and tongue until she comes, then penetrates her and goes slowly and gently till she comes again, then by that time she's madly in love with him and begs him to come back tomorrow night. At least there're no twins.

[rohina]

Yes, it seems like "rape" = "getting talked into sex".

[behold_the_muse]

Right, it's rape if you regret giving in.

[rohina]

I was thinking more along the lines of - they've all taken chastity pledges, but if it's rape, it doesn't count.

[rosenshyne]

I'm a huge fan of romance novels (junk food for the mind), but the "He raped me, but now I love him" ones make me want to vomit. At the first mention of that kind of storyline it's off to the swapping site.