Jun "More Awful Than You": Stupidass Houses!

[J. M. Pescado]

Same drill, this time: Find the least awesome houses in existence! Do they choke your game? Are they utterly unplayable? Thoroughly non-awesome? Pick them out here, and point out the awfulness. Houses explicitly billed as purely decorative not qualified for awfulness on nonplayable grounds.

JUDGES: EMMA, BANGELNUTS.

[Metalkatt]

This explains the lockitude of the noneawesome house contest posts.

[Li'l Brudder]

"Modern Cube House"

What the SUCK?  So much ROOM!



"StartBlou?

Bathroom door blocks sink.

[Gus Smedstad]

Is the bathroom door opening on to the sink actually a problem?  My experience is that the Sim can still use the sink, and has no trouble entering / exiting the bathroom.  The only issue is that someone using the sink blocks the doorway, but sinks are the least used item in bathrooms.  I often do that kind of thing if I'm really cramped for space for some reason.  Sure, the door swings THROUGH the Sim if they go in and use the Sink directly, but that I can live with.

Of course, I always make a point of having the door swing away from the sink, not toward it as in this photo.  Does that make a difference?

It's far more serious if the toilet is placed so a Sim using it blocks access to anything else.  I've made a couple of bathrooms where one Sim was using the toilet, and another tried repeatedly to get to the tub, but couldn't.  Or one Sim was standing in front of the toilet, tried to shoo another Sim next to the tub, and the other Sim couldn't leave because Sim 1 was blocking the exit.  I've since learned not to do that.

 - Gus

[Eleonora]

I don't really see anything wrong with house no. 1. Yeah it's small, but I've had sims living in even smaller houses. I regularly use 10x10 lots which leave you about 6x7 blocks of indoor space, but with 3 floors they still fit a family of four.
The lay-out could have been a bit better. With a bit of shifting I'm sure it would have allowed a 3rd bedroom. Besides the fact that I thoroughly dislike modern cube houses, I don't think it is that bad.

[Zazazu]

It's not awful, but it's typical (read: crap). I took the "so much ROOM" comment without sarcasm. There's barely any furniture, but it's swimming in empty, unused, inefficient space. And it's not pretty, which means it sucks.

I currently have a family of six in an 8x8 three story home. It's pretty, it has three bathrooms/three bedrooms/nursery/living-dining, and no stomping pissy sims blocked from getting around stuff to date...at nearly the end of the second generation.

Li'l didn't show the outside. Wood panelling with a few floor-to-ceiling windows and a completely unembellished flat roof? Ew.

[JennyJenny]

Just a point of clarification here: Does houses mean all lots, or only residential lots?

[Kyna]

My first problem with the first one is that it sleeps three sims but only has one bathroom.  My rule of thumb is: number of bathrooms = (number of sims/2) +1.  So I'd need to add another bathroom to it.  Fortunately there's room in the master bedroom for a small bathroom with shower and toilet.

And what's with the couch placement?  It's looking at the back of the stairs.  The stairs chop up the usable space in the living room into two barely usable spaces.  I think if I downloaded that I'd move the stairs and do a total redesign of the upstairs.

I wouldn't bother downloading it.  If I download a house, I don't want to spend time redesigning it to make it work.  I may as well just build the lot myself instead.

[JennyJenny]

http://www.modthesims2.com/showthread.php?t=168794

A Moroccan themed house. The base shape/layout of the house isnt all that bad, but the addons, like the outside stairs and the flooring make my eyes hurt.

[RatedARRRR]

I think if I had to choose between being homeless and living in house with those roofs/dormers I would totally choose being homeless.

[RaeKira]

Holy crap, now is the time I get to freak out. x.x

Bah, I'd "help" but I'm too lazy.

[J. M. Pescado]

Is the bathroom door opening on to the sink actually a problem?  My experience is that the Sim can still use the sink, and has no trouble entering / exiting the bathroom.  The only issue is that someone using the sink blocks the doorway, but sinks are the least used item in bathrooms.  I often do that kind of thing if I'm really cramped for space for some reason.  Sure, the door swings THROUGH the Sim if they go in and use the Sink directly, but that I can live with.

If the door has to block something, due to the limitations of space, the sink is generally the second item after the "dead tile" of the showertub, although in this case, the door is simply installed backwards, as there's no need to block anything.

[MistyBlue]

Oh shit. I'm gonna see one of my houses here, I know it...

[Emma]

Oh shit. I'm gonna see one of my houses here, I know it...

LOL! I am just waiting for one of my 'bathroomless' houses to appear I think I'll sit this contest out and just point and giggle.

[J. M. Pescado]

Great, in that case, you're a judge.

[rohina]

Well, that's appropriate, since Emma builds cool houses. You should make witch a judge, too, since she has all those good houses.

[witch]

I could be a judge actually, I wasn't planning on entering this one. However you might like to see the Whine and Cheese thread, if you want to see why I'm not entering. 

Oops, wrong thread - still never mind, same applies, I won't be entering this Stupidass Houses either, though I'm looking forward to thoroughly enjoying it. I'm just so busy at the moment, if I could only stop reading forums and get out of bed, I have so much to do.

[Emma]

Okay, I'll be a judge, and thanks Rohina


I'll enter the contest, I've made the house-just gotta take pics and package it

[Diala]

Here's something I found on TSR:



Terrible terrain-painting, terrible design, and lack of space if there was stuff in it. I hope this is suitable.

[witch]

Bomb craters?!?

[Zazazu]

Nope, bet you a hundred they're rather awful terrain paints of flowers. I had too many to count from there that looked great from the posted image but were disgustingly oversized in game.

TSR....oh how I love to hate thee. I used to contribute there, but they threw back all of my lots because they had too much custom content (well, that's granted, though why they waited several months to do so is beyond me) but they approve craptastic stuff like that. Plus, paysite mumble mumble.

[Flamingo]

I didn't think this contest was going to be too horrible. Well, I guess I was wrong.

[scheherazade]

yeeurgh! that thing is hideous all over 

[Gus Smedstad]

That is hideous.  Too simple to have real functional problems, though.  For that, you need something on the order of one of the Maxian houses.  I always did better just gutting those and starting from scratch.

 - Gus

[Sapnish]

I've actually kind of been waiting for this contest. I hate stupid houses. Anyway, I thought I'd try my hand at this "posting" and "contributing" thing you all seem so keen on.

I haven't even bothered downloading any of these (since I've gone a bit OCD on my downloads folder recently and I'd rather not add a bunch of crap to it that I don't even want), but feel free to try them yourselves.

http://www.modthesims2.com/showthread.php?t=70477 "Royal Flush Giant Toilet"

Who wouldn't want to live in a toilet?


http://www.modthesims2.com/showthread.php?t=85433 "Moi's Guingsdon Islet Bridgie House (19.9k starter house)"
...? ...?!?


http://www.modthesims2.com/showthread.php?t=95120 "Falling Water (with & without expansions)"
If killing your game with lag is more your style, I guess you can try this one out: