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Author Topic: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal  (Read 26363 times)
J. M. Pescado
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Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« on: 2007 January 12, 05:32:57 »
THANKS THIS IS GREAT

NOW ON NEW SERVER! DO NOT SEND DONATIONS AT THIS TIME

So here's the deal:
Anyone who contributes money towards this, depending on how much, will receive the following irrelevant and often useless perks.
$500 or more: The title of Prince* and priority for webspaces.
$250 or more: Your title of nobility will be displayed on all present and future AwesomeNet(tm) sites capable of doing so.
$200 or more: The title of Duke* to be displayed on a single AwesomeNet(tm) site of your choice.
$150 or more: The title of Marquis* to be displayed on a single AwesomeNet(tm) site of your choice.
$100 or more: The title of Count* to be displayed on a single AwesomeNet(tm) site of your choice.
$75 or more: The Title of Viscount* to be displayed on a single AwesomeNet(tm) site of your choice.
$50 or more: The Title of Baron* to be displayed on a single AwesomeNet(tm) site of your choice.
$25 or more: The Title of Baronet to be displayed on a single AwesomeNet(tm) site of your choice.

*You will also receive a webspace on request if available usable for any TOS-legal purpose you wish, of unmetered bandwidth and reasonable diskspace. Taxes of 25% will be assessed on any profits produced from your webspace in order to pay for server costs (if your site does not produce profits, 25% of 0 is still 0). Webspace is valid as for as long as the lifespan of the server(s).

All awards are cumulative. Only the highest title of nobility will be displayed by your name. Titles are completely useless and do not grant additional privileges. Titles are hereditary and may be passed onto the descendant of your choice in the event of your death. Only a single donation is necessary to receive title. Multiple donations will be combined and treated as single donation for purposes of title received.

The purchase of a title of nobility does not count towards your monthly subscription fees here, which will remain the same regardless of whether or not we move.
Donations should be funneled towards Paypal. In the event that the deal fails because you were all too slow and the server got sold to someone else, the webspace and title offer will be void and the money will instead be applied towards your subscription fees.

NOW ON NEW SERVER! DO NOT SEND DONATIONS AT THIS TIME
Those whose donations actually went towards the server will be eligible to claim their titles soon. Those who got scammed by Paypal should file disputes.
« Last Edit: 2007 January 23, 07:17:05 by J. M. Pescado » Logged

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cwykes
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #1 on: 2007 January 12, 12:41:42 »
THANKS THIS IS GREAT

If you are willing to host Sedona 20MB and maybe this new hood I'm making 45mb and counting, I'm in.  Wanna suggest a figure for that sort of space? 
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J. M. Pescado
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #2 on: 2007 January 12, 18:27:32 »
THANKS THIS IS GREAT

That would be completely within reason.
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syberspunk
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #3 on: 2007 January 12, 19:55:31 »
THANKS THIS IS GREAT

Can we have a running tally, so we know how close we are to reacing our goal, as well as a telewebivised telethon, complete with Jerry'sRetardo Lander Kids and operatorSenators standing by to take our donations? Grin

Also, how much diskspace is considered "reasonable" and does the amount of diskspace offered increase proportionally to the donation?

Ste
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #4 on: 2007 January 12, 20:39:56 »
THANKS THIS IS GREAT

I'd certainly be willing to kick in $25 if it's a definite go, but I don't want to pour any money down a black hole.  Is there any way to set up a pledge drive, via a poll, or something?
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J. M. Pescado
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #5 on: 2007 January 12, 20:54:21 »
THANKS THIS IS GREAT

Pledge drives are notoriously unreliable on the Internets. So far our actual take is $175. We are 8% there!
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Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I cannot accept, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those I had to kill because they pissed me off.
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #6 on: 2007 January 12, 22:15:07 »
THANKS THIS IS GREAT

So we pick a number and random and you tell us if it's too low.

Use the following at present:
NON-CREDIT CARD: tokenhoarder@victoryismine.org
CREDIT CARDS: allvirgalissuck@victoryismine.org
Note that the amount received via credit card is reduced by Paypal's cut: We never receive this money and your donation is influenced likewise. To avoid this, transfer the money to balance first. This will take slightly longer, but we're not close enough to our goal for there to be a stampede yet.

Can't transfer to balance first as far as I can see.  Account, add funds, just tells me I can't do it.  Is there a sneaky way?  As I'm not US, I'm stuck with credit card.
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J. M. Pescado
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #7 on: 2007 January 12, 22:21:18 »
THANKS THIS IS GREAT

You'll just have to go through the premium processing station, which will deduct about 3% + 0.55. Plan accordingly.
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Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I cannot accept, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those I had to kill because they pissed me off.
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #8 on: 2007 January 13, 19:14:03 »
THANKS THIS IS GREAT

To unlurk finally....

Some of you might find this paypal fee calculator handy. http://www.ppcalc.com/
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #9 on: 2007 January 13, 19:15:11 »
THANKS THIS IS GREAT

Use the following at present:
NON-CREDIT CARD: tokenhoarder@victoryismine.org
CREDIT CARDS: allvirgalissuck@victoryismine.org
Note that the amount received via credit card is reduced by Paypal's cut: We never receive this money and your donation is influenced likewise. To avoid this, transfer the money to balance first. This will take slightly longer, but we're not close enough to our goal for there to be a stampede yet.
Please, once more, and modified for lipless retardos. Step-by-step, please.
You are giving an e-mail address - what should I do with it?
My appreciation for your work, along with my vanity, and especially the hereditary nature of the title, makes me willing to obtain one. It's not because of myself, it's for my child's future, you know.
I have Paypal, and credit card, I'm non-US (from Europe). How should I proceed?
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J. M. Pescado
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #10 on: 2007 January 13, 19:18:10 »
THANKS THIS IS GREAT

Simply feed the "credit-card" based address into Paypal and convert accordingly with aforementioned calculator for the title you wish to purchase.

Now up to 28% in confirmed funds, 33% uncleared.
« Last Edit: 2007 January 13, 20:34:30 by J. M. Pescado » Logged

Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I cannot accept, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those I had to kill because they pissed me off.
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #11 on: 2007 January 13, 20:58:09 »
THANKS THIS IS GREAT

Approximately what kind of time crunch are you under before "this ain't happening"?
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I want people to stop saying, "Son of a bitch". Instead we should say "Son of an ASS" because that is more accurate. Spread the word!

J. M. Pescado
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #12 on: 2007 January 13, 21:03:57 »
THANKS THIS IS GREAT

It is unknown. Servers are sold on a first-come-first-serve basis. If they sell out of this tier of server, we're looking at a slight cost hike.
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Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I cannot accept, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those I had to kill because they pissed me off.
mildlydisguised
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #13 on: 2007 January 13, 21:06:04 »
THANKS THIS IS GREAT

This is indeed a worthy cause if it means I can visit this site without being kicked off every five minutes!

To echo syberspunk, what is a reasonable amount of disk space?  I have a main 'hood (no sub 'hoods attached) still in the planning stage which I would like to, at some point, make available for download.  How much MB should I be aiming to keep my hood below?  Or would this project be too big?
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cheriem
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #14 on: 2007 January 13, 21:12:07 »
THANKS THIS IS GREAT

Question:  What if we want to help but can't afford more than say 10/15 USD and don't care if we get a title?
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RainbowTigress
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #15 on: 2007 January 13, 21:23:29 »
THANKS THIS IS GREAT

I'd donate but I have no money.  Tongue
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ZiggyDoodle
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #16 on: 2007 January 13, 23:20:43 »
THANKS THIS IS GREAT

Someone's asleep at the switch given I sent off an email at 6:52 p.m. last night to the noncredit card e-mail address, stating I would mail a check today but have heard not a peep as to where it should be sent (or made out to, for that matter).

A missed opportunity; no mail service now till Tuesday.
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RainbowTigress
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #17 on: 2007 January 14, 00:14:46 »
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JM doesn't take checks, only Paypal.
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ElfPuddle
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #18 on: 2007 January 14, 00:20:49 »
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Checks would lead to some sort of security issue.
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RainbowTigress
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #19 on: 2007 January 14, 01:06:44 »
THANKS THIS IS GREAT

It's against the internal security code.
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J. M. Pescado
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #20 on: 2007 January 14, 01:10:07 »
THANKS THIS IS GREAT

Question:  What if we want to help but can't afford more than say 10/15 USD and don't care if we get a title?
Send anyway, but send to the correct address.

Current status: 42% cleared, 47% including money in processing delays.
« Last Edit: 2007 January 14, 01:37:07 by J. M. Pescado » Logged

Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I cannot accept, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those I had to kill because they pissed me off.
ZiggyDoodle
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #21 on: 2007 January 14, 02:26:22 »
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Quote
JM doesn't take checks, only Paypal.

Then what the heck is the following for?

Quote
Use the following at present:
NON-CREDIT CARD: tokenhoarder@victoryismine.org

Unmarked bills?

Or just being cute?
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J. M. Pescado
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #22 on: 2007 January 14, 02:50:59 »
THANKS THIS IS GREAT

Transfers to personal accounts via non-credit means don't have any fees. Credit-card processing has fees, but if you enable the option, then those fees are applied to everything.
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Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I cannot accept, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those I had to kill because they pissed me off.
Bangelnuts
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #23 on: 2007 January 14, 03:26:02 »
THANKS THIS IS GREAT

figuring out my finances now to determine how much I can donate
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Re: Dedicated Buttocks Proposal
« Reply #24 on: 2007 January 14, 06:30:48 »
THANKS THIS IS GREAT

I can donate, but I never give my credit card number out by e-mail to anyone ever, need to see a more legitimate  secure way of donating, and I want to be assured that  if it's through paypal that it be a one time charge on my card, those prick's at paypal took  5 bucks for another month subscription to exnem that I never authorized, they'll get a ear full soon from me because of that!.. Angry

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