Getting engaged to/marrying foreign sims.

[vega_pleiades]

Okay, I'm just about at the end of my rope with this. I've looked everywhere for an answer to this, and I'm still not any closer to figuring out what the deal is with this.

For some reason, I can't propose to any foreign sims or get any farther than romantic interest. I have AM installed, and I've tried to get engaged to the foreign sim both when they're visiting and when they're a member of the household. I don't think it's the same bug that other people have reported where sims are randomly engaged to other people: none of the sims I've tested this with have shown that they have a partner in the family tree or if asked if they're single.

Is it by design that foreign sims cannot be married/engaged/etc etc, or is this another EAxian bug?

[Ruann]

I've never been able to get any of those options to work while on a Vacation, even when I didn't have AM installed.  I have to invite them over to my home in the main neighborhood for any of the options to appear.  It may be as designed, but if so it's an annoying design. 

[Budgie]

You could always use the friendly "Ask to Move In" option while on vacation, then either take the foreign sim home to marry, or see if they can marry once the foreign sim is part of the household. I've only ever had a sim involved with a foreign character once, and I knew he was already dating another sim, but once I asked him to move in, the girl had the option to ask him to leave his girfriend there.

[vega_pleiades]

So I tried asking the foreign guy to move in with my sim while she was on vacation in France, and when he did, I checked his relationship panel when he was selected, and it said that my sim was still 'dating' her teenage ex-girlfriend, even though I made them break up and then did Ask To Just Be Friends on the ex. When they returned to the main neighborhood together, she stopped displaying that the ex was her current partner, but I still can't propose either way. I invited the ex over, but there are no options for breaking up or anything related to that...which makes sense since she's not actually 'dating' her while she's at home. So it looks like I had that same bug after all.

Is there a way I can fix this or 'break up' with the ex?

[Aphotic]

Not sure what to tell you, I just tested this and successfully entered my Sim into a gay marriage with his foreign roommate, both of whom have participated in previous relationships - the roommate has an ex-wife with two children. Then again, I'm running 2.28, so I can only come up with a) It's a bug with 2.3, b) you have indeed found some bug that has nothing to do with the version, or c) EA hates straights.

[Metalkatt]

I've not had a single problem with that.  I've had two sims marry others from the vacation 'hoods, and it was simply a matter of mashing the romantic interactions until the "extremely irresistable" level, whereupon the options for steady/engagement came up.  Both were engaged upon vacations.

[vega_pleiades]

For those who got engaged while on vacation: Did those sims have any previous committed relationships before getting engaged to a foreign sim? I mean going steady, previously engaged/married.

[friendlyquark]

No, my dude was single, never been kissed even before I married him off to a China native girl. He got engaged to her in China and then married her when she came to visit.

[Metalkatt]

For those who got engaged while on vacation: Did those sims have any previous committed relationships before getting engaged to a foreign sim? I mean going steady, previously engaged/married.

No, I haven't been able to play enough to test that far.  Laptop likes to overheat.

[J. M. Pescado]

Is it possible that while YOUR sim might not be married or engaged, the foreign sim you're attempting to marry or engage IS, and the relationship doesn't show up due to the peculiar way trans-neighborhood relationships work?

[witch]

I had to be on vacation and make the target sim break off her relationship. Then my sim went home, invited her to stay and was able to go through to the marry/move in option.

[Zazazu]

My starter family has a tradition of finding mates on vacation. The founder found his wife in China. She was a local. They became engaged in China and married in Dragon Cay (main 'hood). The first spawn went to Egypt due to an opportunity and looked for a guy while she was there. I'd planned on marrying her to an Egyptian, but she started spawning socializing wants for a random explorer, also Chinese. They didn't get engaged before she asked him to move in in the main 'hood.

Interestingly, the first time I asked him to visit I waited a day and he transitioned to elder before showing up. I then couldn't interact with him or greet him. Going back to an earlier save and asking him over a day earlier, he came as an adult and there were no problems with interactions.

[vega_pleiades]

I just sent the foreign sim (who now lives in my household) and my sim to travel to all three locations just to make sure that the foreign sim displayed that he was single there as well. He does, and my sim still registers as still dating her ex-gf. So I'm pretty sure that the problem lies with my sim, not the foreign one.

I'm going to move in her ex-gf, then send them on vacation and see if I can get them to 'break up'.

[Aphotic]

I'm pretty sure you would have noticed it if possible, but it doesn't hurt to ask; can your Sim ask this romantic interest to break up with anyone?

[vega_pleiades]

So I sent my sim and her ex to Egypt and they couldn't break up, even when I made the ex a romantic interest again and then asked to be friends. Clearly something is amiss.

And no, Foreign Sim cannot ask her to break up either.

For the record, the only non-vanilla thing I have in my game are AM and some custom hairs.

[PolecatEZ]

Check your family tree for mystery offspring.  I had the same issue...

[Aoife Aella]

I have a somewhat related question: is there any negative effect to having a relationship with an adventure-related sim? I quite liked the idea of my sim with the one who was giving me most of my Egypt quests, but I was unsure if removing him from Egypt would break that, or if another sim would take his place. Logic leans towards the latter, but you never can tell with EAxis.

[Greyform]

I have a somewhat related question: is there any negative effect to having a relationship with an adventure-related sim? I quite liked the idea of my sim with the one who was giving me most of my Egypt quests, but I was unsure if removing him from Egypt would break that, or if another sim would take his place. Logic leans towards the latter, but you never can tell with EAxis.

I've no experience in the area, but I heard that once a quest giver dies, the quest is forever gone. I would assume that removing them from their original 'hood would have the same effect. It's probably safer just to leave them as is.

[Aphotic]

I think that quest givers are replaced, Greyform. I took the food merchant from Egypt as a roommate and one of the adventures I did required that I talk to the food merchant, who had been replaced.

[Aoife Aella]

Yes, the merchants not being gone has been fixed, but this was the character that gave me most of my Egypt quests, not a side sim used for a moment in one quest. A sim key to most of the quests in the region.

[friendlyquark]

I had to restart a game at an earlier save and when I went to France for the first time again (the earlier trip being wiped away) merchants were different since the game was essentially respawning them again. I have to assume that essential folks get respawned after marriage etc.

[Heinel]

It does seem like inter-'hood relationships are very borked.  I did some tests with a sim on a brand new game.  First I had him romance up various people in the base 'hood: singles, steadies, married people (just ask them to break up first) were all romance-able to boyfriend status and add to the heartbreaker LTW count.  I then have the sim go to egypt, romanced up the first guy and then break up, romance up a second guy, then instead of breaking up I went back to the base 'hood.  Invite him over for a visit, break up, then send his ass back home.  After that my sim were unable to go steady with other sims, with or without previous relationships.

[danigantt]

I'm having this exact same issue. Even after using "testingcheatsenabled" to add the French sim to my sim's household, they STILL couldn't get married (I'm not even getting the option to 'move-in' by the way.) . He's not dating anyone and, she broke up with her boyfriend. They're both single. They know all of each other's traits, and their relationship is maxed out.

I even went in and killed that ex-boyfriend of hers. This still didn't work.

There was one point in time when I was trying to see if she could marry him in France, and somehow (on her family tree) she was arriving in France with a child (not baby) by some French guy she had never met. When I used the "fixall" option in AM, it tells me that there are a few "bad sims" and missing relationship links.

It's definitely an EA bug.

[Jens]

I had a similar thing although it didn't involve foreign sims. A female from my active family, who had no previous committed relationships fell in love with a guy also from the main hood, he had an ex girlfriend. He moved into my active household and the two of them went to Egypt, during that trip I decided to advance the relationship to BF/GF but the option never came up. When I looked in her relationship panel for him, under partner it gave the name of his ex girlfriend with the ex gf icon so I waited until they returned to the main hood. On return, in the relationship panel he was now listed as single so I tried again but nothing would get the option to appear even when totally irresistible. No option to break up with his ex appeared when I called her over and she too was listed as single. The only way I could advance the relationship was by using the relationship option on Twallen's SC to make them go steady then they were able to propose marriage like normal.

[Yecats]

Weird.

I've made my sims fall in love and get married.  They got engaged in the home neighbourhood, but got married in the vacation hoods.

Have you guys done the "ask if single" interaction?